There's just something about late nights that calls out to me.

It tends to get me thinking. Overthinking at most point.

Tonight is no exception. However tonight is different. I realised some problems I am facing.

Communication. Compromisation.

It's something that I have always stuggled with. Sometimes, I'm the one building that wall. Sometimes, it's not me. I'm not mentioning anyone in particular. It's something general.

Over the years, I have lost people who I can confide with. I am just protecting them but I have grown weak. Thus, the existence of this blog. I still need someone or some place to let things out. It has been a long time since I really just let things out without restrain.

I do wish there will be a day where I will be able to. But at the same time, I would be destroying bridges. I do not look forward to that nor do I wish for it to happen. It's been really tough. 

What made me want to write a post is because, I was able to finally watch the sequel to The Croods. It's been out since 2020 but I was not able to watch it when it came out. Alhamdulillah for technology. Netflix finally is airing it. Same case with the sequel of Wreck it Ralph. I was able to watch it due to Disney+. 

It took me 3 years before I was able to do something I wanted. It gets me thinking. It will be the same with many things I want. I dont know how long I would have to wait for things to be achieved. Days, maybe months, maybe years.

Or maybe never in this lifetime.

I hope for things to be brighter in the future. With the family I have. With the friends I have. I hope for things to be good in this life, and the hereafter for all of them.

Even if I may not be in their story. There's a lot of people whom I hold dearly and remember. Even if I do not talk to them now. I still remember them. I miss them. 

Have I been lonely? Yes, I have been lonely. The ones that understands me and are able to talk to me are just a handful. Sorry, not a handful. Maybe just one. But I am not able to talk without restrain to him. I still holdback to what I talk about. I have been disconnected with alot of friends. Those that used to be close too. 

Funny thing is that, the one I am able to talk to is the youngest member of my circle of friends. The one I used to called best, we have drifted. 

Anyone whom I drifted apart from, I hope that you can forgive me. I still think about you all. You're all in my prayers. I have my responsibilities and commitments. I hope my future do get brighter.

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